Wednesday, August 31, 2011

A history of teaching


Before I began classroom teaching, I was a diversity educator.  I went into schools and talked about not being straight. Even then, I was worried that looking too dykey would work against me, because not all dykes are so readable. I could talk about discrimination, visibility and the importance of inclusivity.  My personal experience was central and kids love a different teacher, a different topic, especially when it’s a bit taboo.

Fast forward to teaching my own kids. In many ways it was better.  My own class, my own school.  After about six months the kids forgot I didn’t really look like a girl and they knew me as their teacher.  My gender was not confounding, but to me, my silence around it was.  They knew, I knew.  It was not spoken of.  To them, I had a partner, but beyond that the silence was deafening.  A lie of omission.  This is nothing new – the coming out, the not coming out.  I was out to staff and some students.  It’s a glass closet, and what is also visible is your shame.  I look butch, but I’m not willing to speak it.

So I left full time teaching and now I teach teachers.  As with my old students, the teachers I work with know me as a professional and we work well together.  The fodder for this blog is their students.  They see me on random occasions, and they have no idea who I am or what I am doing there.  So they take me on face value.  

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